I was thinking about how I’ve gone from my given name, which doesn’t even begin with an M, to my nicknames–including the diminutive of my given name, which does begin with M, but also other, unrelated nicknames that coincidentally also begin with M–to simply, well, “M.” It might seem at first that I’ve been reduced somehow, but I don’t think so. I feel more like I’ve been pared down a bit, distilled into the most necessary elements. I don’t need all those other letters; the one works just fine and packs more power in less space.
It also serves to illustrate how I once had rather diffuse energy, going off in all directions, but now I’m starting to concentrate that energy into certain channels. Instead of a red giant I am now a white dwarf, smaller and brighter and hotter than before.
I wear a necklace these days, sort of a good luck charm (and I gave a similar one to my female lead in “The K-Pro”) that reflects this sense of myself I’ve developed and am continuing to develop. They will know me by my necklace. It’s the international maritime signal flag for the letter M, which looks something like:
Of course, those who know what the flag means might be confused about what I’m trying to convey. So to be clear
- NO, I am not married or dating anyone named Mike
- NO, my vessel is not stopped and making no way (though sometimes, when I have writer’s block, it certainly feels that way)
- NO, I do not have a medical doctor on board
It really is just my initial, a visual summary of me–the person I am and aspire to be.