The Broken Candlestick
This morning I found myself discussing the properties of magical transference with my seven-year-old son. (I’ll admit, I often find myself having strange and untoward conversations with him, and it’s only once we’re well into them that I begin to wonder why and/or how.)
I know a lot about magic in theory, and I’ll burn a candle now and then—as much because I like candles as because I feel they’re any benefit to my, what? aura? I decided to burn one just the other night, in fact, having chosen the color based on my understanding of the various properties and, in a wishy-washy way, my sense of which planets were in play at the moment. I was having a bad night and thought the candle might make me feel a little better. So I lit it—a taper, in a glass candlestick holder—and sort of focused some of my irritation at it for a few minutes, then went back to work to let it burn down. Every now and then I’d get another little spike of anger, and I’d look over at the candle for a minute or two, and then go back to what I was doing. Candle as focal point, I suppose, though I don’t know if that’s what they’re for. Like I said, I have a lot of theoretical understanding but I don’t “practice” magic. I just look for outlets, for things that make me feel better. Candles do.
Anyway, at one point as I was working away (writing), I heard a loud noise that at first made me think something had fallen off one of my shelves. I glanced around, worried about any one of the lovely knick-knacks and heirlooms I have in my office. Then I looked down at the candle. The candlestick had cracked open, right down the middle, and half had broken off (but the candle was still standing, still burning). And my first, irrational thought was: Was I really that angry?
I have a collection of these glass candlesticks, have used all of them quite often, but to have one just break in half like that . . . Still, must have been a defect or weakness in the construction, right? I’d only had the candlestick a few months, got them around Thanksgiving. So they’ve been used a lot but they’re not old.
Well, whatever. It was interesting anyway. And what with my son being into wizards and magic, my mind has been venturing in that direction quite a lot of late as I attempt to answer his questions. But in the future perhaps I’ll try to diffuse my anger rather than focus it all in one spot. Just to be safe.